According to the New York Post, Zuckerberg recently "overhauled a variety of Meta’s internal and external policies, ranging from lifting restrictions on speech to 'restore free expression' across his platforms to changing its 'Hateful Conduct' policy to allow criticism of gender identity." Naturally, this would seem like a sensible step toward reintroducing free thought into the echo chambers of Silicon Valley. However, as one might expect, common sense doesn't sit well with those invested in their illusions.

And that’s when the "quiet rebellion" began. When Meta dared to make an audaciously rational move—removing tampons from men’s bathrooms in its offices—employees erupted in fury. The Post revealed that several of these enlightened staffers, who apparently couldn't bear this symbolic "oppression," started staging their own private protests by "bringing in their own" tampons. Yes, this is where we are in corporate America: tampon-smuggling resistance fighters at Meta!

If you thought this was merely a small blip of office drama, think again. What this bizarre protest really highlights is Meta's peculiar staffing choices. Evidently, the company employs a noticeable number of women who firmly believe they are men and, more importantly, are willing to fight tooth and nail for tampons to stay in men’s restrooms. Forget any attempts to gently nudge them back to reality; such moves are now considered acts of aggression that demand righteous defiance.

So here we are, in a world where rationality is revolutionary, and sanity is an "oppressive" force. It seems that at Meta, tampons are not just sanitary products—they’ve become a battleground for identity, delusion, and misplaced activism. The woke tide may have receded, but clearly, some are determined to surf its last waves, no matter how ridiculous they look doing it.

The New York Times reported Wednesday that this courageous band of rebels decided the removal of sanitary products was an injustice worth battling for. In what can only be described as a heartfelt crusade, some employees began to "bring their own tampons, pads, and liners to the men’s bathrooms" to make their defiant stand against Zuckerberg’s apparent return to common sense. To add fuel to this movement, "a group of employees also circulated a petition to save the tampons." Yes, you read that correctly—"save the tampons." It may not have quite the cinematic resonance of "save the whales," but the passion is evidently the same.

Why is this rebellion necessary, you ask? Well, in the worldview of these brave activists, denying access to tampons in men's restrooms is practically an endorsement of white supremacy. That’s right—either allow women who identify as men access to menstrual products in men’s bathrooms, or you’re furthering systemic oppression. Logical leaps like these are just another day in Silicon Valley’s theater of the absurd.

Yet, despite how ridiculous this "quiet rebellion" might sound to most, Meta took it seriously enough to warrant a formal response. The New York Post revealed that Meta’s "vice president of workplace services reportedly emailed the petition signatories directly." In the email, the VP carefully walked the fine line between politeness and firmness. They reassured the staff that it wasn’t Meta’s intention to make anyone feel excluded, explaining that the decision to remove tampons was grounded in reality. The email read: "While it had not been the intention of Meta leadership to make employees feel unwelcome or excluded in our offices, at this point we do not have plans to revisit our on-site amenities offerings." However, in true corporate fashion, the VP added a conciliatory touch, promising to "share your feedback with leadership." Well, at least the tampons’ advocates get a crumb of acknowledgment.

Meanwhile, The Times painted this entire sanitary supply crisis as an ideological struggle, symbolizing Silicon Valley’s valiant resistance to what they termed "Orange Man Badism." Yes, apparently, tampons in the men’s room have become a metaphor for Silicon Valley employees’ quiet defiance against their bosses’ alleged "rightward shift." The article stated that this shift was "a major departure for a tech industry that has typically leaned left and liberal." In simpler terms, if free speech is being restored and gender-critical ideas are being tolerated, it must be a harbinger of doom for democracy itself.

Yet Meta employees aren’t ready to go quietly into this "dark, oppressive" night. According to the report, workers have taken to "subtle acts of defiance" as they mourn their fading utopia. These employees, who once thrived in the protective embrace of ideological echo chambers, now find themselves disillusioned by leaders daring to entertain basic realities. But fret not, for the tampon warriors are here to keep the dream alive, armed with pads, petitions, and the eternal battle cry of "save the tampons!"

According to The New York Times, the "quiet dissent underlines who wields the power in Silicon Valley these days: the bosses." Gone are the days when tech employees would boldly take to the streets to protest every perceived injustice during the first Trump administration. Now, all they have left are these muted acts of "subtle resistance." Oh, how the mighty have fallen—from public marches to smuggling tampons like contraband across office floors.

But the absurdity didn’t stop there. The Times claimed that, based on an internal Meta poll, employees had more pressing concerns for Zuckerberg than company policies or even innovation. One burning question these intellectual heavyweights wanted to ask during an upcoming Q&A session was how the women of Meta could channel "masculine energy" in the workplace. Yes, you read that right. In a world filled with existential crises, some Meta employees are brainstorming how to radiate testosterone vibes.

This question wasn’t pulled out of thin air. During an interview on January 10 with Joe Rogan, Zuckerberg had referred to "masculine energy" as a positive and constructive force. It’s not surprising that this triggered the usual suspects who seem to believe that the mere mention of traditional gender dynamics is an existential threat to humanity. In response to this, Meta’s leadership decided to tweak the Q&A format to avoid any circus-worthy moments. The company announced it would "skip questions that we expect might be unproductive if they leak." Apparently, it’s easier to bypass gender-related melodrama than to risk another viral soundbite.

This entire situation begs the question: has the left truly spiraled so far into absurdity that gender fantasies are now their hill to die on? At one point, their cause might have been grounded in actual socio-economic issues. Now, however, it seems to have evolved—or devolved—into the glorification of personal delusions and identity politics. Wasn’t advocating for failed political ideologies that have historically spread misery across the globe already enough? Now, these crusaders demand that society not only accept but celebrate the rejection of reality as though it were the highest form of virtue.

Ironically, Zuckerberg is the one who showed a rare streak of bravery here. In today’s climate, daring to stand against woke orthodoxy is no small feat. By reintroducing free expression and cutting back on ideological censorship, he’s taken a bold step—at least for now. However, the question remains whether Zuckerberg’s resolve will hold. Will he maintain this stand against the tampon insurgency, or will he eventually cave in and revert to the chaos of woke authoritarianism?

It’s anyone’s guess. For now, though, we watch as Silicon Valley grapples with its identity crisis—one tampon, petition, and Q&A session at a time. Whether this "rightward shift" is a lasting course correction or just a brief coffee break from madness, only time will tell.